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Thread: Shikai ideas for Nadarei Shibusen

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    Shikai ideas for Nadarei Shibusen

    Name: Vennominaga

    Release Command: "Slay them,Vennominaga !"

    Manifestation: A giant seven headed serpent the size of a mid-sized building whose entire body is covered in diamond hard scales. Vennominaga's back is entirely a jet black while his underbelly is entirely red underneath. Each head comes complete with cold colorless eyes that peer through your very soul and enormous fangs whose contents contain a toxin so lethal that even the slightest form of contact in any given area can still be capable of killing in mere moments. And finally each head has a long forked tongue which Vennominaga uses to literally taste fear and anxiety. Vennominaga can be characterized as a being who cares about nothing but pain of others, and could really care less about the harm he causes. Nadarei being his owner is only exempt from this since its necessary for his survival to be ensured so that Vennominaga can have someone to carry out his blood thirst.

    Inner World: A series of small islands formed of thousands of dead bodies surrounded by vast oceans of highly lethal substances as well as blood, guts, gore, scat, vore, and so on and so forth. The air itself is actually formed of an unknown gas that's highly acidic in content and the smell of the place itself can only be described as completely ungodly. For a lack of better words the world in which Vennominaga inhabits is entirely repulsive to all of the five senses. The sky itself is entirely a bright red with black clouds that always bring down a torrential down pour which only serves to increase the volatile state of the already unstable world. Vennominaga can always be found at the very center of this hellish place feeding on the negative emotions of Nadarei's most tragic experiences while laying down on a pile of bodies like a pillow while the rest of his body is covered in a concoction of things that would make anyone convert to egalitarianism on site of this horrific depiction.

    Release Form: Upon the completion of the release phrase Nadarei's zanpakutou will slowly break down into a reiatsu based plasma like substance that spans fifteen meters before breaking off to form two representations of Gorgons, each being twice Nadarei's size. These two beings have a ton of characteristics similar to that of the legendary Medusa in the fact that they each have a body entirely comprised of nothing but multiple large snakes intertwined to form a single body.

    Ability: Utsukushi Kunou 美しい苦悩 ( Beautiful Affliction )

    The user pays 10% of his reiatsu to alter the composition of reishi particles in the air through influence of the adaptive nature of Vennominaga's own power, allowing the Gorgon like creatures to produce a clear gas cloud that stretches out for a maximum radius of twenty meters, which is also movable by using the two rei-Gorgons as the epicenter, and uses the altered reishi particles let loose in the air to interfere with an opposing being's reiatsu control thus negating any reiatsu based moves whose cost's are equal too or less than the amount of reiatsu paid to activate Utsukushi Kunou.

    Ability: Utsukushi Kurushimi 美しい苦しみ ( Beautiful Agony )

    By paying an additional 10% of his reiatsu Nadarei can then turn Utsukushi Kunou into a complete death trap by creating a medium in which the gas cloud is then converted to mimic the characteristics of powerful superacids, that when the opponent comes into contact with the acidic vapor in the gas cloud it almost instantly eats away at the adversaries own spiritual pressure, although it does no physical harm.
    Last edited by Reshin; 03-24-2014 at 08:41 PM.

  2. #2
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    Just need your guys input on how to improve this.

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    You might have enough reiatsu to sub this, but do you have the appropriate ritual card?

    Preliminary things:

    In generally you need to simplify the mechanics, the decay and drains are far too complicated. You can simplify things to just be 'if they're in the cloud the attacks get reduced by the amount paid in per turn assuming you keep paying in the rei'

    Also, there's no need for arbitrary science. It's magic. Magic doesn't need a specific cation. That being said, if you're going to pick a specific cation, I suggest one that can stay in the ground state.

    For the attack, you can literally just have an attack that produces flesh deteriorating acid and you're good to go with a flat cost. That being said, realize most people in this RP are made of sturdy stuff so you aren't going to strip flesh on first application.

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    okay so I altered a few things. What other criticisms may there be so I can get this up and going already.

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