Three criminals found dead inside a rehabilitation center. Most likely just drank themselves to death.
Who am I kidding? Police suspect blood money is involved. Especially that one guy that was killed by an explosion.
It is time for more Hitman: Blood Money. Last time, we saved Agent Smith, took out the target and two bonus targets for more cash. This time, we’re going to a nice little neighborhood where a former criminal is under the watchful eye of the FBI. Someone still wants him dead though so we’re going to oblige the client.
Let’s get started
To start off, we have decided to infiltrate on the day of the target’s son’s birthday party. It is the only day where a lot of strangers are going in and out of the house. Just look at that catering truck.
And look at that clown truck.
Food and entertainment. Now that is a party. Now we have a couple of options here. There are better ways to do this but I decided to go with this one. What one? Well, first I looked around the entire place like I always do, trying to figure out where to go and what possible items there are to collect. And just look at this place. Who has flowers on their garbage truck?
Ugh. Also, the garbage truck has broke down so it’s not going anywhere and one of the garbage men was standing outside trying to fix it. Maybe we can give him a bit of help and he can give us a bit of information.
Or we could do that. And then we could pull the garbage disposal button. After some disturbing sounds, the garbage truck opens up again, ready for the next vic- er more garbage.
But that method was a bit disturbing so I reloaded and went for another way. It is time to infiltrate this party. Just quietly and sneakily.
Clowns are evil, you all know that. That’s why I didn’t use my knockout syringe but a garrote wire instead. I mean, just look at the back of his car. The clown was practically begging to get taken out and stuffed into his own truck.
Now, the happiest clown on the world has arrived.
Now I just mosey on into the home and
Aw, what is this? They scan all the party employees? Be right back federal agent. Just let me get rid of my pistol. My other pistol. This submachine gun. And this pair of gardening shears. Now I can go in and prove that I am a totally harmless clown.
Totally not hitting on the target’s wife.
Totally not getting rid of the dog that could detect Agent 47 regardless of costume.
That dog was a bitch (50% sure) and deserved it.
And also totally not drugging other pervy FBI agents hanging around the daughter’s room a bit too much.
Yep, totally not doing any of that stuff and just entertaining the other agents like a good clown. Also, both the son and daughter are nowhere to be seen at all. Guess it’s better that they grow up to be orphans, hating the government for allowing their parents to be killed because oh yes, the wife is dying too despite not being a target.
First step, now that we have a FBI uniform, we have a lot more freedom to move around. So let’s just follow the target into his private room and well, shut the door.
Oh, and take out his body guard to or the body will be found. Well, the body guard is certainly guarding the body now!
There is also a second objective in this mission and that is to retrieve a microfilm. Now, at the time I was doing the next part, I didn’t really have a reason why I was doing it at the time. It was only afterwards that I found out it was actually useful. But yeah, I picked up some lighter fluid and sabotaged the barbecue.
And then when the wife walked up to use it
Wham. Flambe. And yeah, despite her being right next to the pool, she didn’t really think to jump in. Nor did any of the FBI agents do anything. She eventually fell in by herself though. And man, that is one dedicated pool boy.
It’s alright pool boy, there’s no need to clean that.
The microfilm also happened to be around the wife’s neck, in a fire proof container apparently. So I grabbed that and boogied on out of there. Mission complete and here is my rating.
3 witnesses! Oh we are coming back in here later to take care of them.
What the duck? Crows actually.
And it’s till close enough to the day for this song so just go with it.